Drunk with power after the Supreme Court misruling on same-sex marriage, the gay activists have not reacted all that well. As one writer noted, they were mean. In addition, we watched in April as German homosexuals used pages of the Bible as toilet paper and were tossing their own excrement at Christians protesting a new sexual diversity curriculum . Social media filled up with those type of images and reminders of the hostile and deviant side of this movement. Usually support for the winning side increases after a Supreme Court ruling, but support for same-sex marriage has declined. The public has awakened to the nature of the activists and have recognized the coming assault on religion and free speech.
The Coming Sobriety
For a time there will be residual euphoria. Same-sex weddings will take place in droves. There are lots of decisions to make, guests to invite, gifts to wrap, and honeymoons to plan. Then the time after the “I dos” sets in and that is when the sobriety will begin to appear. Fantasy meets reality. They will wake up one day and look at their “spouse” and realize, “We’re still only around 2% of the overall population. We’re still viewed as sinners by most religions. We still can’t have children with each other. We’re still not really ‘accepted’. We’re still not normal. We’re still gay.” Then the angst returns.
A Fool’s Paradise
Some people have naively thought that “marriage” would somehow end the angst. Once the nation was forced to allow same-sex marriage, that would be the end of the internal unrest. It was a fool’s paradise. In the end, the angst is because they are homosexuals and out of step with mainstream society. The fundamental problem has not been acknowledged much less addressed. They are still a tiny minority of the population. They are still viewed as odd by the majority of people. All the social dynamics that were in place before are still in place and they are still the same people they were before. The paperwork and legal fiction of “marriage” did not solve anything.
One of my friends in the legal profession wrote a little note on Facebook that warned her homosexual friends that things had changed. Marriage was a different legal beast. There was no more “moving in and moving out” as they were accustomed to doing when they have spats. We will learn in the future how many homosexuals actually choose to marry. It may not be all that many since unstable relationship status is a hallmark of the homosexual community.
That’s right. I said it. Homosexual relationships are unstable. By comparison to heterosexuals, they are a very promiscuous lot. They go through many more sexual partners on average than their heterosexual counterparts. Their marriages and relationships don’t last as long as those of heterosexuals. In fact, stable homosexual families are rare (see this for a brief recounting of some facts). Lesbian relationships only last on average about five years. This seems counter-intuitive as females are perceived to be family and relationship oriented but the reality is somewhat different. With two women comprising the household there is a higher dissatisfaction rate within the relationship than with a male/female relationship. Consequently, such arrangements do not last as long. Male homosexual relationships last longer but are rarely monogamous. They are almost always “open” marriages. That means that the two men have other sexual partners during the marriage in order to satisfy their sexual desires. Naturally, this leads to dozens or hundreds of partners over a lifetime for most males, lots of cheap sexual encounters, exposure to diseases, and a shortened lifespan.
Much of the above is a brief summary of data from The Bible and Homosexual Practice by Dr. Robert A. J. Gagnon from the subsection The Dearth of Lifelong,Monogamous Homosexual Relationships (2001, pp. 452-460). While the data in that section is being replaced and updated with more recent and long-term studies, the general pattern is still clear: heterosexuals have fewer sex partners over a lifetime; have longer, more stable relationships, and have much, much higher levels of fidelity within the marriage.
One of the ways that homosexual marriages do damage to the institution of marriage is that they severely degrade it by their brevity and instability. Think about all the flack that marriage has taken with the erroneous myth that fifty percent of all marriages end in divorce. That number is false to begin with, but by comparison to homosexual marriages it looks stellar!
Sexual fluidity is not something that homosexual advocates like to talk about or even acknowledge. I’ll quote from Dr. Gagnon’s book what is still the observed truth: homosexuality is not an immutable condition. People can and do change. Dr. Gagnon writes, “The evidence to date, however, points to considerable fluidity in a spectrum from heterosexual to homosexual. People who at one time or another experience homosexual impulses do so at different times of life, and for periods of different duration. Many exclusive homosexuals come to the ‘realization’ about their ‘true’ sexual identity relatively late in life. Many who identify themselves as exclusively homosexual early in life subsequently become predominantly or exclusively heterosexual later in life. None of this corresponds to a doctrine of biological determinism” (p. 418). In fact, over 90% of people who have had homosexual encounters have also had heterosexual encounters. For women the number approaches 95%. In fact, studies have shown that people can and do shift across the Kinsey spectrum of sexuality one, two, or even three times in some cases (Gagnon, pp. 419-20).
Fluidity indicates that sexuality is not a fixed, and immutable trait and it contributes to the relational instability. Additional factors argue that it is not a trait that is good, healthy, or worthy of societal support.
Homosexuals will still continue to have higher percentages of mental illness than heterosexuals. The open marriage lifestyle that gay men live is not mentally healthy. It is inherently unstable, dangerous, and cheap. The need for exogamous sexual partners is not the sign of a healthy, bonded relationship equivalent to heterosexual bonding.
The conscious fact that they are abnormal in society weighs on the mind. Even in the case of a same-sex marriage where children are involved, the simple fact of the matter is that the same-sex “parents” will be the minority at the average school “Family Night”. They are still square pegs trying to fit into a round hole.
There is also the rarely-discussed psychological reality that two same-sex people are not opposites psychologically and emotionally. There is no real complementarity to counterbalance the other person. At the most, you get either a highly feminized male or a highly masculinized female in terms of body style, clothing, mannerisms, and make-up. These are attempts at supplying what is lacking in the complementarity but they are not and cannot truly reach that goal.
Dare I say that the type of sexual activity necessary for a same-sex partner cannot be equated to true gender complementarity? The peculiarities involved in the types of so-called “intercourse” that homosexuals must engage in are not complementary. It is perhaps in this most intimate relationship that homosexuals inwardly realize their dissimilarity to the heterosexual world. Women must use artificial male substitute devices; men must penetrate parts of the body not designed for reproduction and not designed to take the abuse of rigorous sexual activity. There are no procreative options so the primary goal has to be turned to the gratification of the participants. Let it suffice to say that the cumulative weight of all this does damage to the mental health of the average homosexual.
A Hollow Victory
The victory is hollow. It was won with intellectually vacant ideology; it was won only by circumventing the democratic process (which was 32-2 against it); it was won only by illegal judicial activism in violation of the Constitution. So, it is a very shallow victory indeed. The day of “sobriety” is coming. The pain and suffering will continue and it will spread to others through family courts and religious persecution because at the heart of the matter is “sin”. Homosexual activists don’t like to be called “sinners” and that is what the Bible calls them. Legally married or not, they are still sinners.